So Close

I am so close to the end of my manuscript, I can feel it! No, really I can. It's nervousness, elation, and sadness twisted together in a braid that looks great from the outside. But you know what? I wouldn't trade these feelings for anything in the world.

When I go into the book store I head straight back to the Christian fiction section and just stand there gazing at rows upon rows of beautiful cover art and different genres. I told my husband last night as we drove home from Mardel's how visually taking in all those books is painfully joyful. I look, wanting so badly for my own book to be among the many I see, and yet I know that at some point in my life, it will.

I am sure, unless life changes dramatically, that I will have this manuscript done by mid February. I thought I would have had it done last Friday, but after phone calls and a little procrastination on my part, that didn't happen, although I will say, I got very close. I can't just end it. Is this me? Is it that I don't want to part with my characters? Or just the way things are? I am not really parting with them, I plan on a series. I just really want it to end well, not abruptly and seeing as the story took the proverbial steps up to the climax of the book, it seems only right they take steps down to the end. I need to end it with dignity and a sense of closure.

It's funny though, I have a small group of friends/ family who know about my writing this book and lately whenever I tell them my word count (it grows almost daily) they say; "end it already!" Makes me laugh.

93,970 words ;)

Finally Writing Again

I know, I know, I have been bad. What with the holidays, and illness' and my husband's injury, logging writing time has been more than difficult. But, I have managed to find a routine to help work around, or rather with these disturbances. On December 18th my love, at work in the wee hours of the morning walked through a solid, steal fire door. Without knowing, as he passed through it, the door came off it's hinges and as he walked away, it fell on him. I got the call at 7am that morning. Quickly I readied the kids for school, and dropped them off, not wanting to tell them and cause their days to be worrisome. I also told Isabel's teacher who graciously offered to take the girls home with her after school if needed. And when I got to the hospital, I saw it was needed. I am so absolutely thankful God protected my husband. Had the door hit him seconds earlier, had he walked a little slower, he would be paralyzed or dead. Instead, it hit him in the leg, knocking him to the ground and hyper-extending his calf muscle. After x-rays and MRI, and many Dr. appointments we have learned he suffered muscle damage and tendon tears. Small price to pay for the effects of a three hundred pound door starting a fight with a two hundred pound man. Alright, alright and you wonder what does all this have to do with writing? Besides the fact that it pulled me away from it? It gave me a chance to read novels in the many hours I have spent in waiting rooms in the last month and a half. And now, I write again! Yes, I have devised a plan. He can't drive and is to have physical therapy three times a week. So, on those days I drop the girls off at school, go pick him up at work, take him to the appointment, and I sit in my car and wait for almost two hours. I bring my few research books I need, my laptop and a coffee. In my little Ford Focus, I write. And I rather enjoy it too!

Strange how when God wants something done, He provides a way to do it, despite the many obstacles. And you ask why not write the two days you aren't the taxi driver? I have prior commitments that I see as necessary to my book really. An in depth Bible study class on one of those days, and I serve as a Bible study teacher to two year old's on the other day. Both are days full of learning for me about Jesus, which in turn reflects in my writing.

Now, I am nearing the end of my very first book and flooded with emotions. Excitement to have completed an actual book and yet afraid to finish it because then my writing goes from just a fun private story, to allowing others to read it which in turn causes me to feel very vulnerable. Not a feeling I excel at by any means. However, I am going to do what I need to do to as the Lord puts it on my heart. And plus, I can't wait to see what picture they would pick as the cover! I know, sounds trivial, but something I think about all too often. :)

81,789 words