But, I'm not posting about my conference experience today.
Lets celebrate Halloween!!! WOOHOO!!!
And to usher in the night of fright, I'd like to post a deliciously dark scene from the manuscript I'm currently querying, Dark Waters. I'm posting this to read and have fun, and I'm hoping you'll find a deliciously dark scene from your book and post it too! But, just to be clear, I'm not posting this for critiques. By the way, the ancestors of my main character, Allura, were man-eaters. ;)
I absorbed the
air pushed into my body and my nose rose with a jerk. Blood tainted oxygen
shot through my nostrils and swirled across my pores.
Damn.
My nose led the
way as I skipped behind him, far enough back to keep anyone from noticing he
had a follower. I felt like whistling as I skipped, like a school-girl
anticipating a lollipop. Only, I didn’t wear pigtails and I wasn’t interested
in licking to find out what was in the center of my brand of tootsie roll pop.
Mr. Tasty rounded
the corner of the back of the school. I slowed my pace and scanned the surroundings. We were far from the student parking lot and there were no
teachers around. We were alone.
Perfect.
I edged closer to
the corner. Mr. Tasty’s scent stirred nearby. My heart pounded. A drop of acid
fell onto my tongue. I savored the taste. My fists clenched and the muscles in
my legs began to twitch. I gripped the wood slats my body pressed against. My
nails dug into the forgiving surface.
I pushed my body
from the building and leapt into the path of Mr. Tasty. He eyed me skeptically
before pulling something from his pants pocket. Old green trash dumpsters boxed
him in between the building and me.
“What do you
want?” he asked, lighting a blunt.
I eyed the
muscles in his forearm as they contracted and stretched with every flick of the
lighter. My jaw twitched, anxious to sink my teeth in and tear. The edges of my
mouth tightened.
“Smiles won’t get
you anywhere with me. I don’t share.”
I took a step
closer to him.
He shrugged and
breathed out a puff of dense smoke.
I inhaled through
my nose and absorbed the air into my pores, relishing the scent he exuded. The
smoke smelled somewhat like his blood, tinges of earthy musk. Billows of red
clouded my mind. Blankets of scarlet wrapped our surroundings like fabric. No
more dumpsters. No more school. Just me and Mr. Tasty and the promise of a
crimson satin embrace. The assurance that a perpetual emptiness would soon be
filled. The knotting and twisting of my stomach would be calmed. The painfully
loud pulsating in my temples would be satisfied.
A thud sounded.
Then another, and another. My feet pounded the pavement but it felt more like I
was floating to him. I didn’t know if his breath caught, or if Mr. Tasty screamed
out as I lunged at him. I only heard the thudding in my chest and head.
He fell back to
the cement and I toppled down with him. The blunt dropped from his mouth. His
eyes were large circles of white. I sat on his stomach, straddling him. It
seemed he didn’t know whether to push me off or stick his hand up my shirt. I
knew, though. I knew what was next.
My right hand
pressed over his mouth and my left hand grabbed his arm. That’s when he started
to struggle. When he realized I wasn’t on top of him for his pleasure.
No. It was for
mine.
I forced his
forearm up and sunk my teeth into the flesh.
Oh sweet mother of…
A spasm ricocheted
through my muscles as I tore at the fibers of his. I pulled my face from his
arm. His leg. I wanted his leg too. As a repositioned my hold on him, a sound
broke through my red wall of euphoria. An animal sound.
Immediately I
clung to my prey. Mine. No animal
would steal my target; I had tracked and hunted him. They hadn’t. A low growl
vibrated from my curled lips. I swung my gaze to stare face-to-face at a large,
hairy dog. It barked over and over. I raised my arm to smack it away when the
red haze slowly lifted. It was barking. At me. Not to fight me for my meal, but
to alert others.
I jumped back and
crouched near Mr. Tasty’s feet.
Crap.
“Help!” he yelled
as the dog yapped and snarled at me. “Help!”
I scurried on top
of him again and shoved my right wrist into his mouth. The bracelet stifled his
shouts. I couldn’t risk him remembering me. I forced my wrist harder into his
mouth until he choked and gagged.
“I’m so sorry,” I
whispered. “I’m so sorry.”
Ooh! Creepy! Definitely a perfect snippet for Halloween. I really love the tension throughout this, as well as the descriptions. Helps make the scene so vivid and in-the-moment! It was also so fun to see a girl be a creeper for a change, instead of a guy. You don't really see much of that in books!
ReplyDeleteThanks! That's exactly why I wanted to write about Allura. :) I wanted the creeping to be done by the girl! ;)
DeleteWhoa! New scene? Love it :) Very intense!
ReplyDeleteThanks! Yeah, I added a few new scenes to tighten the tension and clean up the subplots. :)This guy is Mr. Tasty, right after the classroom scene.
DeleteVery nice :) And very impressed with your revisions here!
DeleteThanks, I'm glad. It was really fun to write. ;)
DeleteFreaky! Great scene. Descriptive and tense. She's very animalistic, which I loved.
ReplyDeleteShannon at The Warrior Muse
Thanks Shannon!
Delete